Day 5: Speech Dorks, Part II

First, I want to thank the great state of Illinois for passing same-sex marriage equality.  Now I can see same-sex equality every time I look across the Mississippi River.

Back to the saga, of Jamie and Natalie, or Speech Dorks in action.  Over the summer to my senior year I broke up with Randy, which was sad.  Randy worked hard to still be my friend, but I did not make it easy on him.  I started my senior year with one thought in mind to getting the hell out of Crawford County.  The one thing I actually looked forward to that year was my final year on the Speech Team.  I went to my first meet with high expectations for a good season. As soon as I showed up for the first round of Duet Acting there was Natalie ready to perform with her acting partner.  I pasted on my glad to see you face and thought, "Well, guess she didn't go away."

Senior Picture, Fall 1983

Natalie for her part was glad to see a familiar face and prattled on about practicing opening a pack of cigarettes for her role as Becky in "Bad Habits" by Terrance McNally.  She kept laughing about how that was the easiest thing to do because she smoked.  I stayed to watch her performance and was surprised by how funny Natalie could be.  The character she played was a very feminine, very vain woman, so against type for Natalie. I must admit a part of me was giving Natalie a second look for friend potential.

Later that day I went into the gym to regroup with my teammates, but found only Natalie and Mollie on the bleachers.  Mollie was asleep with her head on Natalie's knee.  Natalie was stroking her hair.  My heart sank a little because Mollie and I were not good friends.  Mollie had obviously staked a claim to a friendship with Natalie and I knew I had missed my chance to get to know Natalie better.  Accepting the situation, I sat down next to them and started chatting.  Later Natalie would tell me how I had surprised them and they could not believe I was so clueless to what was going on.  I must admit I kind of was clueless.  Natalie also told me she was annoyed that I showed up and ruined their private moment.  I think about how on those bleachers Natalie's present and future were right there within her reach, if only we had known.  However, had we known maybe things would have turned out different, fate is tricky that way.

Day 3: Speech Dorks

Couples always have that how they met story.  I love telling people about the first time I met Natalie.  Natalie actually hates this story.  She has even asked me not to tell the story because it bugs her so much.  I have told her about the month long project and this story will be today.  She took the news well.  I can only hope that she understands for me meeting her is one of those moments, which helped to define the rest of my life.  Okay, disclaimer done.

In the fall of 1982 I was at a Speech Meet in Vienna, MO.  Yes, I admit it, in high school I was a speech dork.  I had finished the first round of my poetry reading and had just entered the gym to catch up with my friends between rounds.  Almost immediately I saw a friend of mine from a neighboring school.  She was on the far end of the gym and she had with her a very cute boy in a navy corduroy suit.  From where I stood he was about her height and had a head of black hair.  I remember very clearly thinking, that my friend had to introduce me to that very cute boy.  Before I could catch up with them they were gone and I went on to the next round of events.

Somewhere between the second round and finals, I headed to the restroom.  I walked in and there was that very cute boy with my friend and the two of them were smoking cigarettes.  I know I must have stopped, stunned by what I was seeing.  No, not minors smoking in a restroom, but that upon closer inspection the boy in the navy corduroy suit was a girl.  I could not help, but notice the girl's dark eyes and that she had a lopsided smile like a pirate.  I was disappointed by her gender, but you know I still thought she was attractive.

Natalie 1983

I was too young and naïve to have realize that gender did not have to be a issue, in 1982 words like gay and lesbian were only mentioned in hushed tones or loud taunts.  I spent the rest of the speech meet with my friends and putting my initial attraction to Natalie away as a mistake.  Over thirty years later I still remember the exact shade of that navy corduroy suit and the little flutter in my heart the first time I saw that lopsided pirate smile.