Sunday, March 4, 2012

What a Difference a Year Makes, or Year One of Married Life

Today I am lucky enough to celebrate, my one year anniversary as well as my 46th birthday.  If you remember last year, Natalie and I eloped to Iowa and were married (http://tempestinapot.blogspot.com/2011/03/lucky-in-iowa-or-how-i-got-married.html).  For newlyweds it has been a good year.  We have continued on with our lives, living as everyone does with the usual ups and downs.  This year has seen changes for gay and lesbian couples in America.  New York state became the 6th state to say yes to same sex marriage, thank you for that New York.  Maryland and Washington states are also saying yes to marriage for all of their citizens.  Things in California are looking up too, the courts are setting precedents saying it is discrimination to not allow same sex marriage. New Jersey is also on board to legalize same sex marriage. 

Circa 1989

I hope that my friends and family recognize that after 24 plus years together Natalie and I deserve the rights all married couples enjoy.  Natalie and I have made the trek to a law office and done everything we could to get the rights of a married couple, but a court of law could take those away from us, if pressed.  I have no family medical leave from my job if Natalie gets sick and I need to take care of her because they do not offer domestic partner benefits.  The federal government does give Natalie family medical leave for partners, but stops there.  I am not covered under her health insurance as a spouse should be.  Nor am I eligible for her pension if something were to happen to her, despite 20 years of taking care of her life while she has been all over the world for the government.  These are hard pills to swallow as I age and think about our future as a lesbian couple.  Possibly, next year I may be blogging that the federal government put on their big girl pants and started recognizing marriage licenses for all their citizens. I can only hope.  And I do hope.

Commitment Cermony 1992

Don't get me wrong things have improved, improved by bounds.  Natalie left a ROTC scholarship in college partially out of fear of being discovered as a lesbian.  Now photos of gay marines are on the Internet charming (some people) with their much deserved homecoming kiss.  Polls are in our favor, we are cresting the 50% approval  for same sex marriage (http://blog.christianitytoday.com/ctpolitics/2011/03/poll_growing_pu.html).  I have hope.  Hope that you my friends and family will see my life with Natalie and realize that we do not bring end times with us only the dream that one day, we will be legally married in the United States.  Maybe this time next year for my second anniversary I can have the gift of equality.

Cousin's Wedding Fall 2011

5 comments:

donna said...

That is my wish too, for you and for all my friends. That the rights that we have are for all of the citizens of this great country. Until they are, are we really free?

Charade said...

With liberty and justice for all - what part of 'all' do they not understand? Congratulations on the longevity of your marriage. Twenty years is quite a milestone.

Tempest ina Pot of Tea said...

Thank you for the support, I am just impatient and want it NOW.

Angie said...

Oh my gay, you guys are babies in that first picture! Hilarious!

Tempest ina Pot of Tea said...

Well we weren't born old Angie. This is what you and your squeeze might look like in the future. :))